We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Self​-​Contained Chaos

by Gabriel Monticello

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price

     

1.
Reflections 04:20
I’ve come so far. I’ve got so far to go. Sometimes to move forward We have to abandon all we know It all breaks down And I’m breaking down too But I’m mostly scared of breaking The life I’ve built with you. Is it me? What do I see? When I look into the mirror There’s a stranger staring back. Staring back at me.
2.
Is it his wit? Is it his smile? What is it about him that drives you wild? You’ve given up your dignity. I think that you’ve lost your sanity. He's everything that you detest but one look from him and you regress. And every time he tells you lies You lick it up. It drives you wild. You say that he’s the only person Who makes you feel this way inside. Handsome and strong. He can do no wrong. He is and always will be your guy. A two bit con and a petty thief He made you betray your beliefs. You swear that he’s telling the truth But you turn your back and he’ll turn the screw. There’s nothing that gets through to you No matter what I say or do. He's got you now right by the balls You better run cuz your daddy calls. You say that he’s your favorite person But you know that he will make you cry. Through thick or thin, You’ll stick with him No matter how much he cheats and lies. WHY? Would you lie for him? And would you cheat for him? Would you steal for him? Would you rob for him? Would you kill for him? And would you die for him? OH NO! You say that he’s the greatest person That you have ever known in your life. All that you’ve been through is OK by you So long as you have him by your side. You say that he’s the only person Who makes you feel this way inside. Handsome and strong. He can do no wrong. An ignorant buffoon that you fetishize. WHY?
3.
Forever 03:59
You are my sunshine when there is rain. You are my comfort whenever I'm in pain. And when I need a friend, I can count on you. And I know that our love is true. I'll love you forever. Together Forever. I Love You Before I knew you, I didn't know love. You're all I need and who I trust. We'll be together until the end. My sweetest lover and my best friend. I'll love you forever. Together Forever. I Love You.
4.
Languishing 03:12
5.
No More 03:28
You’re always looking out for number one. I see the damage from the things you’ve done. You primp and pose, pretending to be King In hopes of living out your empty dreams. Your days grow shorter. You can’t validate The life you’ve chosen. It will be too late. I see right through you and the things you say. You cannot fool me with the games you play. You know you had it all But then you threw it away. I really want to know Who do you think you are? I saw the best in you But that has melted away. You lie, and you deceive. Who do you think you are? You twist the truth, and you paint disguise. Find a new fool. I see through your lies. You try to distort reality To make us all believe your fantasy. You try to make me doubt my sanity. You say there must be something wrong with me. But we both know that you won’t atone. No more excuses. Just leave me alone. I put my trust in you And I have been betrayed. You’re a bad memory. Who do you think you are? My eyes are open now and you won’t get your way. Find someone else to bleed. Who do you think you are. Don’t fucking lie to me. Who do you think you are?
6.
7.
I used to love to stay out late. I’d drink and smoke and party. Now I just want to Go to bed early My Saturday nights were filled with weed and whiskey. Now it’s Lipitor and a shot of decaf coffee. I used to be so cool, so dangerous, and edgy. Now the kids all laugh and call me old and grumpy. Old No longer hip. No longer cool. Man The kids all laugh at this old fool. Blues I’m in denial of the truth. I’ve got the Old Man Blues. My hair fell out of the top of my head. It's growing from my nose and my ears instead. Don’t know what’s going on with the kids these days With their Tide Pod Challenge and their Tik Tok Craze. I see the reflection of my aging face. Who is this old man? When’d he take my place? Old I still pretend that I am young. Man But when I try to have some fun, Blues That’s when I dislocate my hip. Old Man Blues Getting old is such bullshit! Old All that I love is out of date. Man I like to go to bed at eight. Blues I’m in denial of the truth. I’ve got the old man blues You kids don’t know how good you’ve got it. When I was your age, we respected our elders, but we were also punks who thumbed our noses at authority. Bah!!! I’m gonna have a glass of warm milk and go to bed. For crying out loud. Cut the Malarky will ya?
8.
9.
Was It? 03:34
We’re all heroes in our own story but do the ends justify the means when you’re only out for the glory. And it’s so easy to lose your way when your broken dreams tear you down from day to day. Did you really have to sacrifice your love? At the end of the day when the noise dies away. And when the story’s over and you find that you’re alone Tell me something my friend. Was it worth it in the end? Do you ever think about the choices you have made? Look upon the faces and reflect? Is it something that you regret? You had to clear the way no matter what the cost, but when you turn around to find me, you’ll realize what you have lost. You burned everything and scattered ashes of our lives And dance around the flames as if it all were just a game. Did you really have to sacrifice our love? At the end of the day, when the noise dies away. And when the game is over and you are alone Tell me something my friend, was it worth it in the end? You wanted to play games and you lost it all. Tell me something my friend, was it worth it in the end?
10.
Delta-8 05:31
11.
Soaring 04:20
Everybody needs someone to help them through the dark. We all need a friend. We all need a friend. When you came along you really helped to lift me up. With you by my side; Spread my wings and fly. Soaring every high Till we touch the sky Just you and I Soaring ever high. When I’m feeling lost, I know I can count on you To help me though it all. Catch me when I fall. I can find my way in this world with you by my side. You’re my gentle guide. Teach me how to fly. Soaring every high Till we touch the sky Just you and I Soaring ever high. You are not alone. You don’t have to make it in the world alone. We all need a friend. Everybody stumbles now and then. Everybody needs someone to help them through the dark. We all need a friend. We all need a friend. I can find my way in this world with you by my side. You’re a gentle guide. Teach me how to fly. Soaring every high Till we touch the sky Just you and I Soaring so high.

about

This year, 2022, I turn 50. This milestone spurred on two highly personal music projects for me. The first was that I dug out my old band cassettes and transferred them to digital. I haven’t listened to many of these tapes in over a decade. My brother, Tony, and I had started recording music before we could play. Listening to me grow, both musically and emotionally, was a deeply touching experience. The other project is this album. My first intention was to try to get Tony & Mark Taormina to record new material with me. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen. I was able to get a lot of input from him and his council was invaluable in the recording process.

Self-Contained Chaos is a personal album. I debated posting it for the public. I may decide to remove it from this platform at any time. Feel free to download it (for free) if you want. The last few years have been unlike any other. When Covid forced us into social isolation, musicians were among the first to lose our work and the last to return. Many people, who I love dearly, have passed away. I can also feel my age physically. My last personal album, Stuck In The Basement (2010), was about facing middle age. This album is, in part, about facing old age. I also wanted to return to my roots. I wanted to make spontaneous music and soundscapes. While my original hope of reuniting with Tony and Mark Taormina didn’t happen (yet), I approached this album with as much of the mindset of the old days as I could. Obviously, you can never get back to a point in time, but I had fun trying. Ultimately, I decided to share this album. Some of these songs tackle sensitive topics. I hope that they help someone going through similar situations. Some of these tracks are just for the fun and love of music. I played most of the instruments on the album but have listed any samples for each track.

I hope you enjoy them,

Gabe

credits

released August 10, 2022

Gabriel Monticello: All Instruments except where noted.

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Gabriel Monticello Atlanta, Georgia

While Gabriel spends most of his time playing classical music, he also likes to rock out. Here are some of his bands from the past. You can also find him by looking up the following: Artifactual String Unit, Space Mirrors, Jeremy Aggers, John Burke, Band Of Doctors among others. ... more

contact / help

Contact Gabriel Monticello

Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

Gabriel Monticello recommends:

If you like Gabriel Monticello, you may also like: